My passions run deep...from politics to sex, cooking to health care I have opinions. I talk about living with a mental illness & a physically debilitating disorder. Free speech is critical it is our DUTY to uphold its principles. Regardless of the Republicans' views on the subject. I love art. So, I am always on the lookout for fun, frivolous and visually challenging art to view. Anyone can look at a bowl of fruit. It takes an appreciative eye to see beauty in the whimsical.

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

I am insane today

Ok, along with the job search comes the insane part of this process called - INTERVIEWING!!!

THIS is why I do not work and play well with others. I would have a full court press melt down during this stage if I were the one having to do the actual interviews.

Oh, and then there is the WAIT!!

I CANNOT STAND THE WAIT!!

Hubby, bless his heart, does the interviews so well. And then there is the wait. Do they want him? Will they call him back? Will the recruiter call him back? Will the recruiter call him again if that particular job doesn't want him, or thinks that he didn't interview particularly well?

Wait!

Wait!!

Wait!!!

It is an insane process. Who thought it was a good idea?

And, he hardly ever gets to meet these people who are interviewing him face-to-face. Nope, he is a tech-head. So, he does tech interviews. They are done over the phone. They are almost always over an hour long. They are grueling. Or, at least they seem so to me.

I can't seem to sleep right now. I can't seem to process information really well, and I'm the one trying to keep up with all the "job search" crap going on.

I'm checking his email, replying via email to recruiters, sending out resumes, fielding phone calls when they come in to the house phone, tying to keep the bad news from him and channel any good news to him as quickly as possible.

I feel like I am juggling about a dozen balls all at once and someone out in the audience is feeding flaming batons into my juggling act. So far I am keeping everything up in the air - but, I feel the crash coming.

I do not think I can keep up this pace much longer - and yet, it is this pace that must be maintained until he has a job. I will take as much of this burden on as I can so he can keep the job he has until he has a new one...I just hope I don't lose it all before we have to make the actual move.

I'm starting to have panic attacks again. I haven't had them in so long - my heart rate was up to 114 the other day during one. Nothing I am doing is working to keep them away. Oh, and to add to the stress, I am working to transfer from one laptop to another because of a warranty replacement. It's a laugh a minute right now.

I'm going back to installing software on the new laptop. And, trying not to go buy ice cream, or go on a buying spree. Either would be detrimental.

Night all,
Whimsical-Annie